Date: March 26, 2023

“I’m being forced to let shit go in this season. And I’m realizing that I’m tired of fighting.
It’s exhausting, and it comes with so much resistance. Flowing isn’t easy based on my own conditioning, but I know it’s the most natural state to be in… so I’m really trying to return back to it. It’s a lot of work. I’m at a place in my spiritual development where freewill no longer feels applicable to me, and I’m upset, frustrated, and aggravated by that most of the time… Cause regardless of how stubborn and egotistical I want to be… I simply can’t. My awareness is too clear for me to be in those spaces fully. It’s this constant state of surrender that’s required … And now more than ever I’m grieving and mourning… I’m seeing myself die in real time… These last 4 years I died so many times, but never was I ever this aware of my death… Never did I truly know that I don’t have control over it like this moment here. Everything that once felt safe or comfortable doesn’t… I’m in this chapter where I am being forced to bloom while knowing I am releasing sooo much. Loneliness has been a mood for me. I feel completely alone. I’m accepting it’s just that season for me. The voids and the emptiness are not meant to be filled… I can’t give them any more placeholders.
They just have to be felt. “
The Saga Continues.

-Sunset🌻